Wednesday, July 11, 2012

Yaksha Prashna - II


Prerequisite: Yaksha Prashna- I 

*****
 Act 4. @Bhima comes to the pond.
Impatient with thirst, he goes to have a drink and hears a loud voice.
STOP! O Bhimasena! DO NOT drink water from my pond without first answering my questions. Otherwise you will die like your brothers!

Only then @Bhima sees his brothers. He is shaken. Then he stirs.
“I will kill you for bringing this fate to my brothers!". The impetuous prince takes a step forward and lunges towards the crane. The crane escapes and viola! the mighty @Bhima falls down dead.

Act 5. @Yudhistira comes to the pond. 
He scans the area and sees his brothers. He laments over them and then goes for a quick drink. Then he hears the voice.
O Dharmaraja! You cannot drink water from my pond unless you correctly answer my questions. Or else you will suffer the same fate as your brothers!

@Yudhistira is taken aback. But he realizes that this is no ordinary crane. These questions aren't going to be ordinary. He feels relief that his mind is clear of clutter, his new year resolution to restrict using social media to between 4-5 PM is really paying off.
@Yudhistira: Can I gleet for help? I may not know the answers to all Q's.
@quiz_Or_die: Yes. You have 3 lifelines, to one circle / one person at a time only. Use them wisely or die! 
      (Suspenseful music, spotlight on @Yudhistira)

@quiz_Or_die: Who is the friend of the traveler?
@Yudhistira: A companion
@quiz_Or_die: Who is friend of a householder?
@Yudhistira: The spouse.
@quiz_Or_die: Who is friend of the sick?
@Yudhistira: A physician.
@quiz_Or_die: Who is friend of the dying?
@Yudhistira is stumped. He thinks, one dies alone. His wealth, his smartphone, his circles, all stay behind. Lifeline please, he says. I'll call on @Draupadi.

@Yudhistira ---> @Draupadi Dupa dear, I need some help. Please tell, O wise wife, “Who is the friend of the dying?”
(@Draupadi is just bringing out the Akshaya Patra to request dinner. She is shocked at the gleet. She correctly guesses that the other Pandava brothers are harmed.)

@Draupadi ---> @Yudhistira O King, I cannot live without my husbands. No one will understand me. The beautiful practice of polyandry is already on decline..
                   ---> @Yudhistira ..Evil will surely increase in society. *sob*
@Yudhistira ---> @Yes, Dupa dear, I am trying. Right now, I need to answer- “Who is the friend of the dying?”
@Draupadi ---> @Yudhistira There is only one friend of the dying. His/her charity. The untangled goodwill that one leaves behind.
@Yudhistira ---> @Draupadi ---> Oh yeah. Like in #ff's we give.
So @Yudhitira answered: His charity. (He is right!)
       (claps from background)

@quiz_Or_die: Next round.
(And he went on. @Yudhistira finds his groove and does not take a false step. It is most impressive. The Q's of the Yaksha came in groups of 4 and so did the answers. Stuff that legends and philosophies are made of. Well until almost the end. Read on.)

@quiz-Or-die What enemy is invincible? What is an incurable disease? What kind of man is noble and what kind of man is not?
@Yudhistira feels beaten with these. This time, he seeks help of @Krishna.
@Yudhistira ---> @Krishna Cousin dear, do you know the answers? Did you hear?

(@Krishna is in his gardens at a Gleetup at Dwaraka, where they are discussing the pros and cons of 6 hole and 8 hole flutes. But he answers, unhurried and pleasant as usual. But anytime @Krishna comes online, there is this buzz, everybody tunes in and listens or interjects. Everyone seems to want something from him- men want to befriend him, children want to hang out, animals and birds want to listen to his flute, women want to love him, the sky wants to shade him blue)
(@Kauravas start listening, as does @Karna. Heck, the whole of @India starts listening). Go on.

@Krishna ---> @Yudhistira Yo cos. I say, one can give a man fish or teach him to fish.
@Yudhistira ---> @Krishna Are you pulling a 'paradigm shift' on me? *angry*
@Krishna ---> @Yudhistira LOL. Amplify the context, O even-minded King. Do not get angry.
    (Then it clicked for @Yudhistira!).
 
@Yudhistira ---> ANGER is the invincible enemy. Greed is an incurable disease. He is noble who desires the wellbeing of all creatures. One who has no mercy is not noble.
       (claps from background)
@quiz_Or_die ---> Last round. Who is truly happy? What is the greatest wonder? What is the path? What is the news?
@Yudhistira: Lifeline please. @Keshava again. Who else, really? Haha.

(Okay, we have to digress here. You surely noticed that the gleet went out to @Keshava. Here's the scoop- @Krishna has only one Glitter Handle but apparently responds to many ID's. How that is happening is something that @Shakuni is desperately trying to unravel. He sits on the board of a company – SahasranamaHackers, which is non-profit and their code is open source.  They apparently are very close to unraveling this matter.)
.
@Krishna ---> @Yudhistira I heard the Q. Dude, this crane speaks like a Yaksha who is free from the cycle of birth and death.
@Yudhistira ---> @Krishna Wut?
@Krishna ---> @Yudhistira It lives in the moment, it talks the walk with inaction in action & action in inaction.
First confused then inspired, @Yudhistira answered, turning to @quiz_Or_die
@Yudhistira: One who has no debts is truly happy. We all die one day but we think we will live forever, that is the greatest wonder. The path that is hidden in caves of our hearts is the only path. The world of ignorance is a pan, the sun is the fire, time is the ladle, this is the news!
       (applause from the background)

@quiz_Or_die: You did well, O son of Kunti. As a boon, you can get one brother back. Choose.
@Yudhistira: I choose @Sahadeva
@quiz_Or_die: Oooooh, not your own brother? A step-brother? Sure?
@Yudhistira: Yes sir.
@quiz_Or_die: Okey dokey, you get all of them back. Trick question that was.

(All the Pandava brothers came back to life and slowly rise up, rubbing eyes and confused. Also, there is a shower of flowers from the sky which adds to the confusion)

At which point, @Krishna surprisingly sends out a gleet to his circles- @PanchaPandavas Fresh lease on life, yeah? Did you hear, Xx xxX xxx xxXx? cc @Yadavas
@Nakula ---> @Krishna What sir? What did you say? Didn't get it.
@Krishna ---> @PanchaPandavas @Yadavas Hahaha. Not much. I just said  ------------------- “LIVE FROM DWARAKA, IT'S SATURDAY NIIIIGHT!”
(Lots of loud music, to which the Yadavas start rocking and as if on cue, @Satyaki takes off and dunks himself into a vat of Madira). Whoever said the DwaparaYuga isn't fun?
 
*****
The Pandavas walk back to their ashram for dinner. Draupadi is waiting and is delighted to see them except for a fleeting thought- 'Sigh. 5 husbands and not one is on time for dinner'.

Don't ask me about the deer, I don't know, okay? But if you ever see a deer with a charger on its antlers, still running around, you know why that is.

*****