Yaksha Prashna - II

Prerequisite: Yaksha Prashna- I 

*****

 Act 4. @Bhima comes to the pond.

Impatient with thirst, he goes to have a drink and hears a loud voice.

STOP! O Bhimasena! DO NOT drink water from my pond without first answering my questions. Otherwise you will die like your brothers!

Only then @Bhima sees his brothers. He is shaken. Then he stirs.

“I will kill you for bringing this fate to my brothers!". The impetuous prince takes a step forward and lunges towards the crane. The crane escapes and viola! the mighty @Bhima falls down dead.

Act 5. @Yudhistira comes to the pond. 

He scans the area and sees his brothers. He laments over them and then goes for a quick drink. Then he hears the voice.

O Dharmaraja! You cannot drink water from my pond unless you correctly answer my questions. Or else you will suffer the same fate as your brothers!

@Yudhistira is taken aback. But he realizes that this is no ordinary crane. These questions aren't going to be ordinary. He feels relief that his mind is clear of clutter, his new year resolution to restrict using social media to between 4-5 PM is really paying off.

@Yudhistira: Can I gleet for help? I may not know the answers to all Q's.

@quiz_Or_die: Yes. You have 3 lifelines, to one circle / one person at a time only. Use them wisely or die! 
      (Suspenseful music, spotlight on @Yudhistira)

@quiz_Or_die: Who is the friend of the traveler?

@Yudhistira: A companion

@quiz_Or_die: Who is friend of a householder?

@Yudhistira: The spouse.

@quiz_Or_die: Who is friend of the sick?

@Yudhistira: A physician.

@quiz_Or_die: Who is friend of the dying?

@Yudhistira is stumped. He thinks, one dies alone. His wealth, his smartphone, his circles, all stay behind. Lifeline please, he says. I'll call on @Draupadi.

@Yudhistira ---> @Draupadi Dupa dear, I need some help. Please tell, O wise wife, “Who is the friend of the dying?”

(@Draupadi is just bringing out the Akshaya Patra to request dinner. She is shocked at the gleet. She correctly guesses that the other Pandava brothers are harmed.)

@Draupadi ---> @Yudhistira O King, I cannot live without my husbands. No one will understand me. The beautiful practice of polyandry is already on decline..

                   ---> @Yudhistira ..Evil will surely increase in society. *sob*

@Yudhistira ---> @Yes, Dupa dear, I am trying. Right now, I need to answer- “Who is the friend of the dying?”

@Draupadi ---> @Yudhistira There is only one friend of the dying. His/her charity. The untangled goodwill that one leaves behind.

@Yudhistira ---> @Draupadi ---> Oh yeah. Like in #ff's we give.

So @Yudhitira answered: His charity. (He is right!)

       (claps from background)

@quiz_Or_die: Next round.

(And he went on. @Yudhistira finds his groove and does not take a false step. It is most impressive. The Q's of the Yaksha came in groups of 4 and so did the answers. Stuff that legends and philosophies are made of. Well until almost the end. Read on.)

@quiz-Or-die What enemy is invincible? What is an incurable disease? What kind of man is noble and what kind of man is not?

@Yudhistira feels beaten with these. This time, he seeks help of @Krishna.

@Yudhistira ---> @Krishna Cousin dear, do you know the answers? Did you hear?

(@Krishna is in his gardens at a Gleetup at Dwaraka, where they are discussing the pros and cons of 6 hole and 8 hole flutes. But he answers, unhurried and pleasant as usual. But anytime @Krishna comes online, there is this buzz, everybody tunes in and listens or interjects. Everyone seems to want something from him- men want to befriend him, children want to hang out, animals and birds want to listen to his flute, women want to love him, the sky wants to shade him blue)

(@Kauravas start listening, as does @Karna. Heck, the whole of @India starts listening). Go on.

@Krishna ---> @Yudhistira Yo cos. I say, one can give a man fish or teach him to fish.

@Yudhistira ---> @Krishna Are you pulling a 'paradigm shift' on me? *angry*

@Krishna ---> @Yudhistira LOL. Amplify the context, O even-minded King. Do not get angry.

    (Then it clicked for @Yudhistira!).
 

@Yudhistira ---> ANGER is the invincible enemy. Greed is an incurable disease. He is noble who desires the wellbeing of all creatures. One who has no mercy is not noble.

       (claps from background)

@quiz_Or_die ---> Last round. Who is truly happy? What is the greatest wonder? What is the path? What is the news?

@Yudhistira: Lifeline please. @Keshava again. Who else, really? Haha.

(Okay, we have to digress here. You surely noticed that the gleet went out to @Keshava. Here's the scoop- @Krishna has only one Glitter Handle but apparently responds to many ID's. How that is happening is something that @Shakuni is desperately trying to unravel. He sits on the board of a company – SahasranamaHackers, which is non-profit and their code is open source.  They apparently are very close to unraveling this matter.)

.

@Krishna ---> @Yudhistira I heard the Q. Dude, this crane speaks like a Yaksha who is free from the cycle of birth and death.

@Yudhistira ---> @Krishna Wut?

@Krishna ---> @Yudhistira It lives in the moment, it talks the walk with inaction in action & action in inaction.

First confused then inspired, @Yudhistira answered, turning to @quiz_Or_die

@Yudhistira: One who has no debts is truly happy. We all die one day but we think we will live forever, that is the greatest wonder. The path that is hidden in caves of our hearts is the only path. The world of ignorance is a pan, the sun is the fire, time is the ladle, this is the news!

       (applause from the background)

@quiz_Or_die: You did well, O son of Kunti. As a boon, you can get one brother back. Choose.

@Yudhistira: I choose @Sahadeva

@quiz_Or_die: Oooooh, not your own brother? A step-brother? Sure?

@Yudhistira: Yes sir.

@quiz_Or_die: Okey dokey, you get all of them back. Trick question that was.

(All the Pandava brothers came back to life and slowly rise up, rubbing eyes and confused. Also, there is a shower of flowers from the sky which adds to the confusion)

At which point, @Krishna surprisingly sends out a gleet to his circles- @PanchaPandavas Fresh lease on life, yeah? Did you hear, Xx xxX xxx xxXx? cc @Yadavas

@Nakula ---> @Krishna What sir? What did you say? Didn't get it.

@Krishna ---> @PanchaPandavas @Yadavas Hahaha. Not much. I just said  ------------------- “LIVE FROM DWARAKA, IT'S SATURDAY NIIIIGHT!”

(Lots of loud music, to which the Yadavas start rocking and as if on cue, @Satyaki takes off and dunks himself into a vat of Madira). Whoever said the DwaparaYuga isn't fun?

 

*****

The Pandavas walk back to their ashram for dinner. Draupadi is waiting and is delighted to see them except for a fleeting thought- 'Sigh. 5 husbands and not one is on time for dinner'.

Don't ask me about the deer, I don't know, okay? But if you ever see a deer with a charger on its antlers, still running around, you know why that is.

*****

Yaksha Prashna - I

(A drama adapted for Glitter, based on the 'Yaksha Prashna' from the Mahabharata)

Time ~ 800 to 5000 BC, depending on whom you ask.

Place – Deep in the forests of ancient India, by the side of a pristine pond.

Chief feature – Everyone has a smart phone and is on Glitter. That's right, what we knew as Twitter was acquired by Google in 2014. They renamed it Glitter. They have THAT then. Glitter is very similar to Twitter except it has circles.

Cast:

A Yaksha in the form a crane. He is also the quiz master who quizzes from @quiz_Or_die

Pandava brothers - @Yudhistira, @Bhima, @Arjuna, @Nakula, @Sahadeva, their wife- @Draupadi,
Krishna himself - @Krishna

@Karna - The King of Anga aka Sutaputra.

@Kauravas – The 100 Kaurava brothers (yes, they share the same handle). 

Background: The Pandava princes are in the last part of their 14 year exile in the forest. One afternoon, a hermit came by and asked for help. My andriod charger got accidentally entwined in a deer's antlers, which then ran off. Please bring back my charger, he requested.

Bound by Kshatriya duty, the Pandavas put aside surfing the web and followed the deer. The deer panicked and ran off deep into the thick jungle. After a long chase, the Pandavas got tired and thirsty. Pausing the search, @Yudhistira, the oldest, asked @Sahadeva, the youngest, to fetch some water.

***** 

Act 1. @Sahadeva approaches the pond.

A crane is relaxing in the pond, laughing, for he is ROFLing to a gleet. But his mood darkens when he spots @Sahadeva.

Halt! he thunders. O son of Madri! You cannot drink water from my lake unless you answer my questions. Or else you will die.

@Sahadeva is shocked. But he quickly recovers and thinks, duh, talking crane is all is interesting but a crane is a crane is a crane. I've got to gleet about this later. Hehe. He ignores the crane and drinks some water. Boom. He falls dead on the spot.

***** 

Act 2. @Nakula approaches the pond.

(After waiting for a while @Yudhistira had sent @Nakula in search of @Sahadeva and water).

@Nakula sees the water and moved by intense thirst, takes some in the cup of his palms.

Stop! O son of Madri, he hears. He turns and sees a crane. Then he sees his twin brother lying dead. The water spills from his trembling hands.

@quiz_Or_die: You have to answer my questions before you can drink. Or else you will die like your brother.

@Nakula is shocked. The whole thing feels surreal, right out of a sci-fi palm-leaf book. He decides to go along.

@Nakula: Can I use Glitter, can I gleet the question if I don't know the answer?

@quiz_Or_die: Yes, but only once and to only one Glitter circle/person. One lifeline only, said the crane. Use it wisely or die.

       (background music starts, then pauses dramatically, spotlight on @Nakula)

@quiz_Or_die: What is heavier than the Earth?

@Nakula: Mother.

       (claps from background)

@quiz_Or_die: What is taller than the sky?

@Nakula: A cellphone tower?

       (a hush in the background)

@Nakula falls dead on the spot.

***** 

Act 3. @Arjuna arrives on the scene, sent by @Yudhistira.

Despite being very thirsty, he is cautious and is shocked on seeing his brothers lying dead. When he tries to drink the water, he hears a voice.

Halt! O Partha! Do not drink my water without answering my questions. You will die like your brothers or if you don't answer correctly.

@Arjuna: Shoot! (no pun intended). But say, can I seek help via @Glitter?

@quiz_Or_die: Yes, you can use up to two gleets. To one circle or person only. Be wise or die.

       (background music starts, then pauses dramatically, spotlight on @Arjuna)

@quiz_Or_die What is taller than the Sky?

@Arjuna Father.

       (claps from background. @Arjuna takes a bow)

@quiz_Or_die What is faster than the Wind?

@Arjuna Lifeline please. I'll choose @Draupadi

(@Arjuna goes his Glitter circle of Wives and gleets to @Draupadi).

@Arjuna ---> @Draupadi Dru dearest, quick, do you know what is faster than the wind?

(@Draupadi is back in their ashram, brushing her long, lustrous, silky hair. It is much work, she does not have help and her arms are getting tired. But she responds)
 @Draupadi ---> @Arjuna 5 husbands and not one can help me. Pray tell, when can I put my hair up again.

@Arjuna ---> @Draupadi Soon dear. My life is at stake here. Lifeline this is. “What is faster than the wind?”

@Draupadi ---> @Arjuna Whaa? Why are you being strange? Is it about another wife?

(One can say that @Draupadi is a bit possessive of @Arjuna's affections after the Subhadra episode)

@Arjuna ---> @Draupadi No, no, this is a real crisis. @Nakula and @Sahadeva are already dead.

(@Draupadi nearly faints. But being a sharp woman, she quickly reads the situation)

@Draupadi ---> @Arjuna Two answers. 1. Wifi connection 2. Mind

(@Arjuna thinks for a second and picks “Mind”. He is right!)

          (claps from the background)

{We have to digress here for a bit. You may wonder, rightfully so, if Arjuna's gleets to @Draupadi were not seen by others, even inadvertently by his brothers who were still waiting for water and relaxing with their smartphones. No, they didn't. Because a. They were bound by the dharma of Glitter and marriage – the brothers currently not dwelling with Draupadi cannot look into her personal gleets. See, how it all works out?)

@quiz_Or_die What is more numerous than grass?

@Arjuna Gleets! (excitedly)

       (a hush in the background)

And so the valiant Dhananjaya falls down dead. 

**** Will be continued in Part II. **** Stay tuned! ****
****** What will @Bhima do? ** What will @Krishna say? ** Stay tuned! ******